How to Get Along with Your Maid

Welcoming a domestic helper into your home in Singapore is more than just an employment arrangement; it's about building a new relationship within your household. 

Navigating this relationship can be rewarding yet challenging, especially considering the cultural and personal dynamics involved. 

Here’s a guide on how to foster a positive and harmonious relationship with your domestic helper, with practical tips and a heartwarming example to illustrate the journey.

Open Communication is Key

Setting Clear Expectations

From the outset, establish clear communication with your domestic helper about your household rules, routines, and expectations. 

This doesn't just mean handing them a list of tasks; it's about having an open conversation to ensure both parties understand and respect each other's needs and boundaries. 

Remember, clarity from the beginning can prevent misunderstandings down the line.

Respect and Understanding

Embrace Cultural Differences

Singapore's melting pot of cultures means your domestic helper might be coming from a very different background. 

Take the time to learn about their culture, festivals, and traditions. 

This not only shows respect but can also enrich your family’s cultural experience. 

Understanding and accommodating their dietary needs, prayer times, and special occasions can go a long way in making them feel valued and respected.

Patience and Support

Adjusting to a New Environment

Imagine moving to a completely new country, away from family and friends, and adapting to a new way of life. It’s daunting, right? 

Your domestic helper is going through this significant transition. 

Show patience as they learn the ropes of their new role and the idiosyncrasies of living in Singapore. 

Supporting them through this adjustment period, such as helping them get familiar with the local bus/MRT system or electrical appliances (it may even be their first time seeing a Dyson!) they might not have used before, can ease their transition.

Create a Supportive Atmosphere

Integrating Into the Family

Consider your domestic helper as part of the family, not just someone who works for you. 

This doesn’t mean blurring professional boundaries, but rather fostering a supportive and inclusive environment. 

Celebrate their achievements, and recognize their hard work and contribution to your household.

The Story of Mdm Tan and Siti

Mdm Tan's domestic helper from Myanmar, Nge Nge, formed a special bond with Mdm Tan's mother through cooking. 

Their shared time in the kitchen, exchanging recipes and stories…

helped Siti feel welcomed and cherished, illustrating how shared activities can strengthen bonds.

A Turning Point for Mr. Lim’s Father

Mr. Lim’s elderly father was initially resistant to their new Filipino helper, Christine, often complaining about her work. 

It was a challenging situation until Mr. Lim’s daughter decided to intervene.

She organized a few sit-down chats where Mr. Lim’s father could express his preferences and daily routine. 

Over time, these conversations led to a breakthrough, with the elderly man starting to show appreciation for Christine’s efforts, even joking to his Kopitiam kakis (good friends) that Christine is his god-daughter. 

This transformation underscored the power of patience, communication, and personal connection.

Mutual Respect and Privacy

Valuing Their Space

Your domestic helper’s privacy and personal time should be respected. 

Ensure they have their own space (if possible) where they can relax and unwind after a day’s work. 

This gesture of respect for their privacy underlines their dignity and autonomy.

Recognize and Appreciate

Acknowledging Their Efforts

A simple thank you can mean a lot. 

Don’t just tell them what they did wrong, but also acknowledge your domestic helper’s hard work and efforts, and provide constructive feedback when necessary.

Consider their well-being and happiness as integral to your household’s overall harmony.

Conclusion

Building a harmonious relationship with your domestic helper in Singapore revolves around mutual respect, open communication, and understanding. 

By taking steps to integrate them into your family while respecting professional boundaries, you can create a supportive and positive environment for everyone at home. 

Remember, it’s the small acts of kindness and understanding that pave the way for a lasting and respectful relationship.